#30facesofautism 2019 - Day 7

Day 7 – For kids that struggle with focus, attention and hyperness (ADHD) you have to wonder what happens inside their heads.  I imagine it to be a scrambled nest of “squirrels” darting to and fro while a symphony of white noise plays – how maddening.  What I continue to notice though is that Baby Girl misses nothing.  She can be watching a video on her ipad, playing with her dolls, making noises, moving and repeat something we have said in a conversation she wasn’t even a part of! It is multi-tasking at a level at which I don’t think we “regular folks” can even understand.  It is scary amazing.  Car rides are next level and there are a few things that NEVER go unnoticed, no mater how fast they are whizzing by or what else she is doing: yellow vehicles, cows, McDonald’s signs, horses, cement trucks and goats colored all (when pushed for explanation as to what color “all” was it was explained that “all” is black, brown and white ones – duh Mom). #30facesofautism

#30facesofautism 2019 - Day 6

Day 6 - Baby Girl still has a great love for ALL things music! Her current requested playlist includes songs from The Greatest Showman, Darius Rucker, Ed Sheeran, The Eagles, Whiskey Myers  and Post Malone. Eclectic! She also still plays the piano in our home frequently and has now started singing along. Her grade level performed a holiday musical this year and she had to have the musical recordings of all the songs so she could learn every note perfectly! Chris also moonlights as the DJ at our school dances and she loves watching him work the equipment. I got the chance to observe the instruction in her music class this year - perk of the job - which was exceptional of course. I found myself unable to take my eyes off of Baby Girl though. She was mesmerized by every little sound, every little motion.  Complete focus. For a hyper little chick with attention issues this is quite an extraordinary feat. She was determined not to miss a single thing the teacher said or did and complied with every directive immediately. It was magic. It was the music. It’s funny to me how a kid who is so sensitive to sounds engages totally with a medium that is nothing but. Her incredible music teacher says it’s time to try some lessons this summer...perhaps Baby Girl will find her voice in a whole different way. #30facesofautism 🎼

#30facesofautism 2019 - Day 5

Day 5 – Last year I introduced you to Baby Girl’s fixation with the line.  Welp, it’s a new year and she’s making new lines.  We’ve got school yard lines, playground lines, conga lines, and llllooonnnggg lines.  In full disclosure that long line photo was totally edited to protect the lazy, I mean the innocent – nobody needs to see my unkempt house with piles of laundry on the outskirts of the line.  I also noticed that there are several “figures” who appear to be inappropriately suited for the line and remain as outliers.  No idea why.  New and most recently this year Baby Girl is proud to now present – GROUPS of lines!  We’ve got big groups and small groups, we’ve got ginormous mosh pit groups and we’ve even got dinosaur groups made at school where they each have their own names.  That compulsive need for order obviously still exists.  What I love most though about how her lines have transformed over the last year is that they are no longer exclusive to one type of “character”.  Everybody is included in the group!  It is truly symbolic of who she is as a human.  She doesn’t care who you are, or what you are, or where you came from, or how you look, if you are big or little, short or tall, have one arm or two, if your Barbie hair’s gone crazy or your wing has broken.  I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t care if you weren’t wearing pants (as long as you’re a doll that is). My point is that for Baby Girl everybody is welcome in her group, as long as you make sure to stay in line. #30facesofautism

#30facesofautism 2019 - Day 4

Day 4 – Since we are on the subject of dogs, we’ll continue - we have one, and a cat.  Baby Girl LOVES them, except she really doesn’t.  Confusing isn’t it?  If you ask her she will tell you she loves them and she will gush about a picture or a video of a cute puppy or kitty.  But in reality she is terrified of both.  They are too unpredictable – the dog is too hyper and the cat is too sneaky – neither of these work for her.  She cannot tolerate being startled – think back to the hand dryer incident.  Same type of thing.  We can keep it under control at home although it requires us facilitating some separation between her and the dog.  Poor Ford.  Baby Girl facilitates her own separation from the cat by always knowing precisely were the cat is and then herding her into my closet, and then shutting the door. Poor Gracie.  It is hard though when we are out in public or at a friend’s house with animals – she and I are both a ball of raw nerves.  I was raised with enough manners not to want to make my hosts feel bad about my seven year old screaming at or running from their sweet precious pup who wouldn’t hurt a flea or their 25 year old cat who hasn’t moved off the ottoman in months.  I end up doing nothing but apologizing and trying to run interference.  I know the fear she has isn’t rational but I can tell you it is real.  It’s time for us to take the dog out and Baby Girl will put his food down for him and make sure he has water while I walk him on the leash because she loves him in the only way she can.  Then after bedtime I’ll go let the cat out of the closet…#30facesofautism

#30facesofautism 2019 - Day 3

Day 3 – Last year I told you all how NO was Baby Girl’s go to word, for years – even when she didn’t really mean it. Over time it decreased in usage and even, when appropriate, transformed into being said politely.  Then one day it just disappeared.  That is so exciting, right? Wrong!  You want to know what it was replaced with? Before we go there I want you to scroll up for a hot minute and look lovingly into that beautiful little angel baby face with those big eyes, long lashes and bright smile – go on, I’ll wait for you……………………… super cute right??? Now imagine having that precious little thing growling at you – like a dog. G.R.O.W.L.I.N.G. People.  Growling is the new NO around here.  It usually only happens when there is a directive about the activity she is engaged in or needs to be engaged in or needs to stop being engaged in. Ugh.  Absolutely a direct result of frustration on her part which leads to the growling which leads to frustration on the adult’s part. Lack of adequate language, routines, inappropriate responses and atypical behaviors are all part of the package.  Luckily, if you could ever count a time when your child communicates with you in canine as lucky, it is not as frequent as NO used to be nor is it done with true anger and aggression.  There is no intent to be disrespectful – she doesn’t really even know what that is. I mean I guess just yesterday I did say some days she IS a puppy, but geez.  So for now we are here trying to figure out how to “retrain” ours.  Sure does make it easier that she’s so cute! #30facesofautism

#30facesofautism 2019 - Day 2

Day 2 – Let me begin by saying a heartfelt thank you to everyone who helped us LIGHT THE WORLD UP BLUE for Autism Awareness today.  I am so grateful to each and every one of you for your support of us.  It dawned on me today that Avin has no idea that she is autistic, or has autism, or experiences an autism spectrum disorder, or whatever other PC way you want to use to characterize her uniquely differentness. Some days she IS a fairy, or a puppy, or a princess, or a mermaid.  She IS a second grader, a reader, a writer, a game player, a dancer, a friend.  She IS polite, loving, spicy, brilliant and opinionated and beautiful.  She IS a niece, a cousin, a sister, a daughter, a granddaughter.  And quite frankly, most days – she IS a unicorn, but that’s a post for another day. So, this morning after she put on her blue I decided I should at least try to tell her we were wearing it "to make people aware of autism".  I have to keep it real, REAL simple with new vocabulary for which there is ZERO context.  I said this several times on the way to school and asked her to repeat what I was saying and she did – sometimes that helps.  Just know that autism comes out autistim every single time.   As we were turning into the parking lot I switched it up and asked a question - Why are we wearing blue today?  Her reply – I’m cceelleebbrraattiinngg people with autistim!! That’s right Baby Girl, because no label will ever define you – you, my dear, will always define who you are for yourself! #30facesofautism

#30facesofautism 2019 - Day 1

It’s April – which means it’s Autism Awareness Month!  A whole year has passed and much has changed for Baby Girl as she has grown and matured.  Along the way I found myself collecting a list of things to share with you this month in an effort to help reveal even more “faces” of autism we have found reflected in our family’s journey.  Even though 365 days have come and gone I find that my goal is still the same – to help others understand, accept and LOVE.  Tomorrow is World Autism Awareness Day and I would love to encourage you to help us raise awareness about people with Autism Spectrum Disorder across the globe as we LIGHT IT UP BLUE by wearing blue for our own Baby Girl tomorrow!  If you do please post your pic and tag us with #30facesofautism